


I like your laugh

by Writing_in_SIN



Series: 100 Ways to Say 'I Love You' [38]
Category: Kamen Rider - All Media Types, Kamen Rider Ex-Aid
Genre: Athazagoraphobia, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Canon, Pre-Relationship, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Soul Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 08:08:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27669995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writing_in_SIN/pseuds/Writing_in_SIN
Summary: Because Parad adores Emu's laugh, he does his best to compile a list of all the things that makes Emu happy. Thing is, it never crossed his mind that he's also a part of that list too.Who woulda thought, right?
Relationships: Houjou Emu & Parad (Kamen Rider Ex-Aid), Houjou Emu/Parad
Series: 100 Ways to Say 'I Love You' [38]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1538683
Comments: 8
Kudos: 33





	I like your laugh

**Author's Note:**

> If you like, come scream at me on [Tumblr](https://writing-in-sin.tumblr.com) or [Twitter](https://twitter.com/Writing_in_SIN)

* * *

**"I like your laugh."**

* * *

Parad adores Emu's laugh.

Not only the polite chuckles or soft snickers, but an unrestrained laugh that comes right from the belly too. Those are especially his favourite. Regrettably, it's not as common as he would've liked for it to be. Sure, he knows that when Emu is happy, he'd show it but it's always polite and held back.

So, like most things he does in his life, Parad turns it into a game; one that he's determined to keep playing for as long as Emu wants him by his side.

While it's true that only Emu himself can make him happy, Parad wants to at least help things along. So, he digs into his memories and pays closer attention (well, more so than usual) to Emu; attentive to the things and people that'll make him smile and laugh.

Playing games and tickle fights are his favourite go to. But he knows that more meaningful moments will make Emu far more happy. Truth be told, Parad _is_ a bit possessive of Emu and trying to find ways to makes Emu happy that doesn't involve him will always sting but Parad likes to think that he's at least gotten better in handling that. He hates to admit it, but there are still moments when he just wants to snarl at everyone who has Emu's attention because what Parad has always wanted from his friend has always been given so easily to everyone else. While he knows it's wrong now, but at the time, can anyone really blame him for being stupidly desperate that he started Chronicle just to get Emu's attention after years of being forgotten and thought unimportant by the first friend he's ever had?

Parad slams his head on the table with a muffled curse.

"...you alright, Parad?"

Raising his head, Parad blinks at Emu who's sitting across from him; a medical journal laid opened on the low table.

At the moment, they're relaxing in their living room and he thought that it's a good time as any to think and add more references to his list.

"Yeah," he mutters, rubbing his forehead. "Was just trying to smash out stupid thoughts, that's all."

Emu snorts, amused and rests his chin on a palm. "I think there are better ways to do that than face planting on the table."

"Maybe." Parad taps his pen against the notepad, shrugging with a sardonic smirk. "But sometimes you just need a good whack to get your head cleared up."

Emu hums, brows furrowing in concern before glancing down at his notepad in curiosity. "What _is_ that anyway? I've been seeing you carrying it around for weeks now."

"Just a game I'm determined to clear." Sighing, he pouts at the notepad. "It's not easy though."

Emu leans closer in interest. "Can I see? I'm a genius gamer too after all so, maybe I can help?"

"Sure," he says with a shrug, sliding the pad over to Emu.

If anyone knows how to make Emu happy and laugh more often, it's the person himself after all.

As his friend reads over the list, Parad mulls over for any more ideas that he can use.

"...what is this?" Shaken out of his thoughts, Parad sees Emu giving him an incredulous stare. "You've been trying to make me _laugh?"_

Parad hunches in his seat and says a touch defensively. "What? I like your laugh! And you deserve to be happy and laugh more often." Waving at the notepad, he shrugs. "Hence the game."

"Then why isn't _your_ name on it?" Emu asks, frowning.

When he only gives Emu a confused look, the doctor points to a list of names of the people he wrote down that makes Emu happy.

"Oh, that," he murmurs before waving a hand dismissively. "Well, the others have always made you happier than I ever did — so." Shrugging, he rests his cheek against a fist and looks away with a pensive frown. "And well, y'know, I gotta remember not to be selfish, right?"

"...who said that to you?"

Curious at the low tone along with the spike of indignation from Emu's end of the bond, Parad slides his gaze back to Emu and blinks at the stormy expression on the doctor's face.

Confused, he points to Emu. "You did."

"What!?" Emu almost falls onto the table then, scrambles over to him and grabs his shoulders in distress. "What do you mean? When did I say any of that?

Parad raises his hands placatingly, trying to calm down his best friend. "Not by words. Just by action that's all."

When it still looks like Emu is seconds away from bursting into tears, Parad sighs and rubs his neck.

"I've always had to compete for your attention, remember?" Biting his lip, Parad stares down at his lap. "It was always the patients or the others in CR or something else. And I get it, it was wrong and cruel of me to start Chronicle." Clutching his hands together, he feels harrowing remorse for his past sins. "But at the time...I thought that it was the only way because I just wanted to play with you. Didn't matter what the game was. I just, y'know, wanted your attention. And I thought, what better way to do that than playing the ultimate game, right? You wouldn't be able to ignore me that way. So..."

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Parad scolds himself for the burn he can feel behind his eyes— he doesn't deserve to cry for the crimes he's committed. He's not the victim after all.

"I just wanted your acknowledgement that I was your friend."

The bond pulses with warmth before he's suddenly wrapped in an embrace.

"You _are_ my friend, Parad— my best friend," Emu says fiercely, holding him close. "For rejecting you and making you feel so lonely back then, that was _my_ fault." When he returns the hug, Emu buries his face into Parad's neck. "I am so, _so_ sorry for that."

Parad shakes his head and brings them closer. "And I'm sorry for lashing out. I shouldn't have hurt others the way I did for being angry."

"...Do you still feel neglected?" Emu eventually asks into his neck.

"No." Something in his voice or maybe his feelings through the bond must've given him away because Emu goes rigid in his arms. Biting his lip, Parad leans his head against Emu's and amends. "Not always, and I know you're not doing it on purpose because I get it now. You've got work and responsibilities."

Emu pulls back to cradle Parad's face. "Still..."

"You've always done your best to spend time with me, so don't worry," Parad reassures.

_Don't be selfish. You're finally friends again. Emu actually cares about you. Don't be selfish._

Emu narrows his eyes and Parad worries that he didn't hide his thoughts as well as he thinks. Thankfully, the human doesn't seem to catch on because Emu turns to reach back for the notepad and taps it almost angrily.

"Then why isn't _your_ name on the list?" Emu demands with a scowl.

Parad blinks, brows furrowed. "I told you—"

"No," Emu refutes, shaking the pad. "Do you honestly think that you don't make me happy?" When he only gives Emu a blank stare, the human gapes at him in disbelief. "Parad, don't you know that I laugh the most; that I'm at my happiest when I'm with _you?"_

Eyes widening, it's his turn to gape at Emu and points to himself. "Me? Really?

 _"Yes,"_ Emu stresses out before he slumps helplessly. "How can you not know?"

Parad throws his hands up in the air. "Because I haven't given you any reason to!"

"Maybe not when we were enemies but, you certainly do now," Emu corrects, reaching over to pinch his cheeks.

Parad whines with a pout.

Laughing, the doctor pins him with a searching look before his mouth twitches into a fond smile. "You don't like sharing me, do you?"

Busted.

"...no," he mumbles guiltily, scowling at the floor.

Emu tips his chin up and brushes a kiss to his forehead. "Hey, I'm not mad— far from it." Shifting so that he can lean back against his palms, Emu coughs and rubs his neck with rueful smile. "Truth is...I'm exactly the same when it comes to you too actually."

"You are?" Parad questions, glancing at Emu underneath his bangs.

Emu nods, smile widening into a sheepish grin. "I've waited my whole life for you and well, having to share you makes me feel..."

When his friend trails off with a helpless shrug, Parad sends Emu a tentative smile.

"Jealous?" he suggests, folding his legs under him.

Emu sheepishly musses his hair. "Yes."

"Me too." Parad gestures with his hands, trying to find the right words. "I mean, we're finally friends again and having to share you is just—"

"Frustrating," Emu finishes with a relieved grin which he readily returns. Turning serious, Emu leans forward. "You know you don't have to compete for my attention, right? If you ever want it, know that you'll always have it." Grabbing his hand, Emu gives it a gentle squeeze. "Okay?"

Squeezing back, Parad nods and feels the vice around his heart easing. "Okay."

Emu lets out a relieved sigh then, raises the notepad in curiosity.

"How long were you going to play this anyway?" Emu asks, giving him a questioning glance.

Parad shrugs. "For as long as you want me by your side."

The hand in his twitches as Emu turns slowly to him with trepidation in his eyes. Odd.

"...What do you mean?"

Parad hums, tracing Emu's palm with a finger. "I honestly don't know how long you want me here with you, since y'know...overtime, you might get bored or fed up or drift away." Turning away, he gives voice to one of his greatest fears and hopes he won't be turned away. "You might end up forgetting me again so I wanna play for as long as I can."

There's a moment of deafening silence before Parad is suddenly tackled into a hug with all the force of a Critical Strike. Tumbling to the floor in a tangle of limbs, he stares up at the ceiling as the air is knocked right out of him and holds onto Emu as the human trembles; clutching him so tightly that if Parad had been human, there'd be bruises on him from the force of the grip.

When the stars fade from his vision, Parad runs a comforting hand through his partner's hair. "...Emu? What's wrong?"

Emu shudders out a sob and the bond mirrors the human's remorse and distress. But why? What did he say to make Emu so upset? Is the game something he shouldn't play after all?

As if Emu picked up his thoughts (which he might, since Parad isn't hiding his thoughts at the moment from the unexpected hug), the human shakes his head against Parad's chest.

"I'm never leaving you again, Parad." Rising up until Emu is straddling him, the human cradles his face. Even with his face blotchy with tears, Emu is still the most breathtaking person he's ever known; more so with the inferno in his eyes. "I promise— I _swear_ to you, I'm never leaving you. So like it or not, you're stuck with me, understand?"

The bond is singing and winds around him in a firm, warm embrace. It leaves no room for doubt to Emu's words.

...Oh.

Emu really means it.

"I understand," he chokes out eventually, voice clogged with his own tears.

Relaxing, his friend nods. "Good. So if you want to make a list, make sure your name is on the top of it."

"Got it," he murmurs, raising a hand to wipe away the tears on Emu's face with the edge of his sleeve.

Sniffling, the human rubs his eyes and blinks away his tears. "And you have to let me play too."

"Eh?" Pausing, he gives Emu a confused look. "How? The game is to make _you_ laugh."

Emu pokes his nose with a watery smile. "In my case, it's to make _you_ laugh."

"Me?"

"Yup!" Leaning down to rest their foreheads together, Emu whispers to him like he's sharing a precious secret. "Didn't you know?"

"What?" Parad whispers back, lips twitching into a smile.

Emu gives him a cheeky grin, eyes warm and fond. "I like your laugh too, Parad. A lot."

They stare at each other for a moment, before they burst out laughing.

...Huh.

Seems like sharing a laugh is something that can be added to the list too.

Good to know.


End file.
